What I'm reading on my sabbatical...

To Be Told, by Dan Allender. This is a book about the importance of knowing and telling your story. I'm reading it because I know there are things about my past that I've yet to understand and share with others. Until I do, I won't fully enter into the story that God has written about me and has yet to write in me, for his glory. I want to be more whole, more at "shalom" with my past and thus more missional in the present.

Allender says that knowing and telling the stories of our lives is essential. I agree. Mission flows out of loving and interpreting our past. We have to identify the themes that have operated in our lives and grow to appreciate them - even those associated with pain and loss.

But spending time on our story takes, um...time! It's slow work. Allender encourages us to take the time necessary to reflect, remember, write down, and share our stories and themes, tragedies and triumphs, with others in the body of Christ. He says that this is a dying art. He says it's as we hear and edit one another's story that we begin to live out of the dreams and passions God has given each of us and so fulfill our unique calling.

All of this would be food for narcissists were it not for Allender's relentless focus on living for the benefit of others. We are to "steward" our story not for our good alone but for the good of the community and world.

One takeaway I found particularly appealing is Allender's call to celebrate more often. He says on pg. 146,

"Stories are food for friends to feast on together. We are called to write and then rewrite, and we also are called to tell our stories to people who love us, people who will celebrate our life. We need people who will ponder our stories and help us write with more integrity and depth. But we need more than mere feedback; we need celebration."

I have told my wife before that my childhood lacked celebration. I did not feel joyfully affirmed by my parents or celebrated for my individuality. As a matter of fact, I grew up feeling an overwhelming and deadening need to comply, to stuff my opinions and emotions, to conform to the wishes of my parents. What celebration there was, was stiff and formal. Here I am at age 55 feeling a great need to feast and celebrate and be glad with friends. Perhaps this book can be the inspiration for more storytelling and celebration at UPC and other places.

Dan Allender is the president of Mars Hill Graduate School in Seattle. I'll be going there in late August as part of my sabbatical to Allender's Story Workshop, which is based on To Be Told. I'm eager to write my story and live out of it more confidently in the years ahead.

This would be a good book for small groups to read and discuss together. There's an accompanying workbook that would enrich your reading of To Be Told.

The Taking of Pelham 123

A few weeks ago I went to the new movie, The Taking of Pelham 123, starring Denzel Washington and John Travolta. It's a remake of the 1974 movie of the same name which starred Walter Matthau and Robert Shaw.

If you like action movies, this one has aplenty. If you don't care about character development or realistic storytelling, you'll probably like it. I do, and I didn't.

But the real reason I'm posting about The Taking of Pelham 123 is to point out something that has increased dramatically since 1974 - intolerably foul language in movies. I couldn't believe the number of F-bombs I had to listen to on the way to finding out how the good guys were going to get the bad guys. It was ridiculous. Later, I checked screenit.com, and found there are at least 102 "f" words plus other expletives in this movie.

Is that really necessary? Hollywood people, why do you do this to us? Why can't you build a movie around an interesting story, good acting, compelling dialogue, and things like that? Must you litter the movie with language that leaves us feeling like we need a bath afterwards? Movies about sinful people and tragic events are one thing; movies that depend on profanity to entertain the audience are quite another.

No need to see this movie. You'll know how it turns out after the first 15 minutes anyway.

What I'm reading on my sabbatical...

Vintage Church, by Mark Driscoll and Gerry Breshears (Crossway Books, 2008). I've become interested in Mark's ministry as pastor of Mars Hill Church in Seattle since hearing him speak at the recent Gospel Coalition Conference in Chicago. He's bold, blunt, evangelistic, and solidly rooted in the historic Reformed Christian faith. He combines loyalty to the Word of God and the creeds of Christendom with a strong passion to see the church win the lost and redeem culture for God's glory.

I chose this book as one of my reading projects for my sabbatical. I wanted to see how Driscoll's perspective might speak into my conservative, PCA, baby-boomer ways. I'm about halfway through the book.

Of course I differ with him on baptism. Mark is a credobaptist. I'm a paedobaptist. I believe that baptism should be administered to believers and their children, as a sign and seal of the covenant of grace and membership in the community of faith. Driscoll, like most contemporary Christians, holds that baptism is for believers only. One of his arguments is that in every instance when the New Testament records a household baptism, it says "that each member of these households believed in Jesus and was saved" (pg. 116). That is not true. In Acts 16, for instance, Paul and Silas go to the house of the Philippian jailer, where they share God's Word with him and his family. Then verse 34 (in the English Standard Version that Driscoll prefers!) says, "Then he [the jailer] brought them [Paul and Silas] up into his house and set food before them. And he rejoiced along with his entire household that he had believed in God." The text does not say that anyone else in his family believed; it only says that HE (the Philippian jailer) believed. It's a singular verb, as the ESV rightly notes. Nevertheless the entire household was baptized. So Driscoll argues too much when he says without qualification that "each member of the households that were baptized also believed in Jesus, was filled with the Holy Spirit, and served God" (pg. 117).

Apart from that, I'm learning a lot from this book. Driscoll makes a solid argument for male eldership in Chapter 3, and says some great things about the importance of preaching in Chapter 4. The book is a good critique of much that passes for church these days. I particularly liked this paragraph on page 52:

"Building on the modern devotion to the individual, modern Christianity in practice defined the entire purpose of the church in terms of the individual over and above the glory of God and benefit of the community of people. As a result, the modern church in its various forms defined the church as a place where individual spiritual needs are met. What developed was a view of individual Christians as consumers with felt needs and the church as the dispenser of religious goods and services."

In our day, when there is such a low view of the local church, Vintage Church deserves a reading.

Sunrise

As I write this I am sitting on the porch of our beach condo. It's 6:32 a.m. and the sun rose over the Atlantic a few minutes ago. I am listening to the symphony of waves unrolling upon the shore with the unceasing chatter of insects as background music, and watching a lone fisherman throwing out his line. Long clouds surround the sun and magnify its golden glory.

Gazing at the beauty before me, I consider that my friend Chris entered into the joy of the Lord early yesterday morning. Right now, as I sit here on earth, Chris is in a place Jesus called Paradise. Whatever beauty I think I see, Chris is seeing so much more: the sunlit face of his Savior, the blazing radiance of angels, the spirits of righteous people made perfect (Hebrews 12:23), the very glory of God.

"Glory of God." It's a phrase we throw around all the time, we church people. I'm thinking that Chris now knows what those words mean. He's actually looking at it, feeling it, exulting in it! We really have no inkling what the glory of God is all about. But soon, very soon, we will experience it endlessly. Like these waves I see crashing upon the shore at Crescent Beach, God's glory will unroll before our vision with unceasing energy and joy. And we will say with Paul, "Death has been swallowed up in victory!" (1 Corinthians 15:54)

Away We Go

Away We Go is a new movie starring John Krasinski and Maya Rudolph. I saw it today with my wife and several other family members. It's rated R for some strong language and sexual dialogue. With that caveat, I recommend it as a movie with a positive message about love and family. Which is ironic, considering Krasinski and Rudolph play an unmarried couple living together and expecting their first child. More on that later.

Burt and Verona are deeply in love and expecting a baby in three months. They embark on a road trip to find a place to settle down and call home prior to the arrival of their baby. Along the way they visit old friends and close and distant relatives, seeking to discover if they could tolerate life in the same city with them. These visits turn into several hilarious encounters and awkward conversations that keep the movie very entertaining. I laughed a lot at some of the weird people that dot the landscape of Burt and Verona's past.

That's pretty much the plot of the movie until the end, which I won't give away. Suffice to say that a home is found, and Burt and Verona share some touching and inspiring moments that reinforce the bond between them and their unborn child.

As I said, Burt and Verona are not married. Nevertheless, the overall message of the film is that marriage is a good thing, that it's made of commitment, and that children are a blessing. Those are messages that rarely come out of Hollywood. It was refreshing to see some of the characters in the movie genuinely enjoying their spouses, adopting children, grieving miscarriage, and staying together in spite of hardship. Near the end of the movie, Burt and Verona visit Burt's brother, whose wife had recently left him. The devastating effects of divorce upon a child are presented with unmistakable clarity.

One interesting side note is that the final scenes were filmed in nearby Leesburg, Florida.

I thought Krasinski and Rudolph are quite believable in their roles. The supporting cast is terrific. It's a simple, low-budget film that (similar to Juno, for example) uses broken, erring people to reinforce family values.

There is something deep in the human heart that aches not only for God but for human community. Whether in the form of marriage, family, or friendship, we need people to survive. I think this movie scores an A+ illustrating this Biblical truth.

What God is looking for

I read Psalm 50 for my morning devotions today. It speaks to probably the most important question one could ask: What does God expect from human beings? Psalm 50 answers: dependence upon him.

Psalm 50 presents God as an inescapable Judge. He comes from Mt. Zion in majestic, holy beauty, and summons all humanity to stand before him. He presents the charges against us. It's not that we haven't brought him enough animal sacrifices. It's not that we've forgotten to go to church. We've forgotten HIM. We haven't been thankful. We haven't needed him.

What God says he's looking for is dependence. He says, "Make thankfulness your sacrifice to God, and keep the vows you made to the Most High. Then call on me when you are in trouble,
and I will rescue you, and you will give me glory.”

The essence of sin is independence from God, and we're guilty. I'm guilty. I think I can make it through the day with bare lip service toward God. I rush through prayers, I offer a quick apology for not being a better Christian, I hardly notice the evidences of God's glory and beauty around me in people and nature. I give him little or no thanks for his million mercies.

God says in Psalm 50:22, "Repent, all you who forget me." I hear him saying, "Stop being so self-reliant. Stop building your Tower of Babel-independence. Call on me." John Piper likes to say, "Keep buzzing the nurse."

I'm struck that thanklessness reveals more about the heart than anything else. When we fail to give thanks, it reveals that we really don't feel a need for God.

God, help me this day to make thankfulness my sacrifice to you, and to honor you through dependence.

Wimbledon and predestination

My wife and I had a funny experience yesterday. We always watch the Wimbledon tennis matches on and around July 4 each year. So yesterday (July 3) I turned on the TV and there was Roger Federer playing Rafael Nadal. It was the last set of what would become the longest-ever men's Wimbledon final.

Immediately we were transfixed on this match between Federer and Nadal. It was reminiscent of those famous match-ups of Borg, Connors, and McEnroe that we used to watch each year.

But wait a minute, this was the Wimbledon final? My wife and I looked at each other and said, "It's just July 3. Why is the final match already taking place?" (You can tell we don't follow professional tennis very much until Wimbledon.) We surmised that there were no rain delays this year or something, so they were way ahead of schedule.

The play wore on between these two tennis greats, until finally Nadal pulled off one of the greatest victories ever: 6-4, 6-4, 6-7, 6-7, 9-7. We were elated!

Then there was a commercial break. When Wimbledon resumed, they were talking about Federer playing in the men's final on Sunday, July 5. What?! That's when it dawned on us clueless people. We had been watching LAST YEAR'S Wimbledon final! It was all on tape. Obviously we had missed the 2008 matches, and didn't know that Nadal beat Federer last summer.

Then I got to thinking theologically...

What if that's how predestination works? God has decreed whatsoever comes to pass. In his mind it's all taken place already. For God, who transcends time, all of history is one cosmic moment which he has planned down to the tiniest detail. Not a sparrow falls to the ground apart from his will (Matthew 10:29). No power in heaven or hell can circumvent or spoil his plans.

But from our point of view, history unfolds second by second in all its unpredictable and unknowable glory. We experience day by day what has already been mapped out in the mind of God. We exult or weep as triumphs and tragedies take place. We are taken by surprise by events that never surprise God. We get the pleasure of enjoying life and anticipating what is yet to happen, while God sovereignly ensures that his purposes stand fast.

When my wife and I realized what was going on, we laughed. Holy, happy laughter is the only conceivable response to the realization that God is sovereign and in control.

Public Enemies

Last night my wife and I went to see the new movie about John Dillinger, Public Enemies. I agree with one review I'd read: "good but not great."

Getting my criticisms out of the way first, much of the dialogue was unintelligible... the oft-used hand-held camera technique seemed out of place here... Dillinger (played by Johnny Depp) moved around a lot and it was hard to know just where the action was taking place. But most disappointing was the lack of character development. Compared to, say, Bonnie and Clyde, this movie gives you little insight into what made Dillinger so evil. When the movie begins Dillinger is well into his life of crime. There's no context. I had to check the internet to discover that Dillinger's mother died when he was just three and he was cared for as a child by his sister. But you see little of that heartache in Depp's Dillinger.

Christian Bale in the role of G-Man Melvin Purvis shows so little emotion that I felt none of the frustration Purvis must have experienced as Dillinger slipped from his grasp time after time. Why do directors not see that actors are just going through the motions, or that dazzling scenery, costumes, and cinematography do not a good movie make?

Having said that, I did enjoy the scenery, costumes, and cinematography a lot! It was a well crafted movie technically. I love seeing details in movies, and there were lots of period details in this movie. One of the shootouts after a bank hold-up was well choreographed, as was the final scene outside the movie theatre. Marion Cotillard was very good as Dillinger's love interest, Billie Frechette.

Unfortunately, some of the "good guys" come off looking pretty bad. I always wonder, is this just another example of Hollywood's bash-American propaganda, or are lawmen really as corrupt and mean as they are often depicted?

One spiritual application I got from this movie is how it illustrates the parable of the rich fool in Luke 12. In one scene, Billie asks Dillinger what he wants in life. He says, "I want it all, right now." The rich man in Jesus' parable had the same attitude. Greed is never satisfied. It leads toward destruction of self and others.

Donald Trump once wrote, "The point is that you can't be too greedy." Dillinger found out that you can.

Prayers matter

Since letting people know about the death of my wife's father yesterday, we have been literally flooded with phone calls, emails, and Facebook messages saying "We're praying for you." I've said that to other people countless times when they need prayer. Now that we're on the receiving end of those messages, it really makes a difference. To know that people who love us are praying, is the best gift of all right now.

Thank you. Your prayers matter to us, and I know they matter to God.

A fan of God?

I'm on Facebook. If you're on Facebook, you know that there are all these opportunities to become a "fan" of something: a celebrity, a restaurant chain, an author, a TV show, a sandwich, and whatnot.

Well I noticed this morning while on Facebook that I could click on a link and become a fan of God. The link said that two other people are fans of God, and I could become one too.

Wow, a grand total of three people in the world, fans of God. Why would I not want to become a fan of God!

This morning I read in my devotions Exodus 19. It describes the time God descended on Mt. Sinai and met with Moses. In the next chapter God would communicate the Ten Commandments. In chapter 19, God was anything but inviting people to be his fan. Here's what it says in verses 20-22:

• "The LORD descended to the top of Mount Sinai and called Moses to the top of the mountain. So Moses went up and the LORD said to him, 'Go down and warn the people so they do not force their way through to see the LORD and many of them perish. Even the priests, who approach the LORD, must consecrate themselves, or the LORD will break out against them.'"

What a graphic way to put it: God "breaks out" against people.

God reveals himself in his Word as a King who sets the terms of relationship with him. He invites us to know him, yes he does. He's forgiving, yes. But it's never the same kind of relationship one might have with, say, the Jonas Brothers. In Psalm 2, we're told to "Serve the Lord with fear, and rejoice with trembling." He is a consuming fire (Hebrews 12:29). He is not to be trifled with. He doesn't give autographs. You don't pose for pictures with God. In other words, you come to him in brokenness and repentance, or you don't come at all.

I tremble when I see how our majestic, fearsome, holy, wholly-other God is often trivialized in pop culture. Even in many Christian bookstores.

Bow before God. Don't become his fan.

"Dad" - 1920-2009

My wife's father passed away today. He was 89 years old. I called him "Dad." My favorite memories of him are the many times he and his wife would take my family and me to the various amusement parks in central Florida when we came down for vacations: Disney, Sea World, Circus World (no longer there), Busch Gardens, etc.

In his prime he looked a lot like Gene Kelly, the actor. He was a physician. He attended Yale, where he was a member of the diving team, and would have been an Olympic diver had it not been for WWII. He spent most of his life in Orlando.

So part of my sabbatical will be walking with my wife on the path of grief. Pray for us.

The Boy in the Striped Pajamas

I rented this movie a few days ago. It's a sad, fictional tale set in Nazi Germany during WWII. It's depressing for its poignant depiction of the horror of the Holocaust as seen through the innocent eyes of 8-year old Bruno, whose father, it turns out, is the commandant of a concentration camp - presumably Auschwitz.

Bruno has no idea what's going on inside the camp, or even that it is a concentration camp. His parents lead him to believe it's a farm. All he can see from his bedroom window are smoke stacks and a barbed wire fence, behind which people at the "farm" are wearing clothes that look like striped pajamas. Bruno's parents forbid him to go beyond the courtyard of their house. He and his older sister Gretel are left to deal with their loneliness any way they can. Gretel falls in lust with one of the Nazi security guards, while Bruno secretly ventures out to investigate the "farm." That's where he meets the boy in the striped pajamas - Shmuel, a Jewish boy confined inside the concentration camp.

Bruno and Shmuel strike up a friendship of sorts, and slowly but surely Bruno comes to understand that this is no farm next to their house. However, not until the end of the movie does the truth break through Bruno's innocence with obscene power. I won't give away what happens.

See this movie. While it is about the Holocaust, it's not at all like Schindler's List, Life Is Beautiful, and so on. The Boy in the Striped Pajamas is more subtle, less gruesome. But in a way, it brings the Holocaust closer to home better than the more graphic films. As you step into the home of this affluent German family, you see how Darwinian theory captured the imagination of the Nazis and led them inexorably to the tragedy we call the Holocaust.

Sabbatical

I'm on sabbatical! My church has a policy of granting their pastors a sabbatical after seven years of service (I've been at UPC for eight). What a great church!

The word "sabbatical" means "any extended period of leave from one's customary work, esp. for rest, to acquire new skills or training, etc." You can see the word "sabbath" in there, too. So a sabbatical is an extended Sabbath rest. It means to take a break, to stop. Between now and the end of August, I'll be "stopping" for five weeks.

I'm splitting up the five weeks of my summer sabbatical this way:

• July 4-18 - two weeks at the beach with family and friends... reading, resting, reflecting, rejoicing
  
• July 19-31 - two weeks of focused reading and study of several topics: the Lord's Supper, discipleship, and my pastoral priorities
• August 19-24 - I go to Seattle, WA, for Dan Allender's "Story Workshop"

I have a lot of books to read. Here's a sample:

• Vintage Church - Mark Driscoll
  
• Instruments in the Redeemer's Hands - Paul Tripp
  
• Who Killed Change? - Ken Blanchard
• Ten Stupid Things that Keep Churches from Growing - Geoff Surratt
• Deliberate Simplicity: How the Church Does More by Doing Less - Dave Browning
• What Jesus Demands from the World - John Piper
• Leading on Empty: Refilling Your Tank and Renewing Your Passion - Wayne Cordeiro

Overall, what I hope to gain from my sabbatical is, in a word, FOCUS. There are so many things a pastor feels pressure to do. They are all good things. But hey, I'm 55 years old. I want to finish well. I want to do the things that only I can do, and I want to do them well.

One of the things I want to do well is disciple believers. I want to do what Paul did: "proclaim [Christ], admonishing and teaching everyone with all wisdom, so that we may present everyone perfect in Christ" (Colossians 1:28). That's what Jesus commissioned us to do.

Yet day to day, it's hard to know how to really pull that off. How can I help UPC be a place where people grow to maturity? What things do I need to say no to? What must be my priorities? Where should I be investing my time? These are questions I'm asking the Lord. Will you pray for me, that my sabbatical will be a refreshing time to connect with God and hear from him about what's on his heart?